The first, and most important, thing you need to remember is that your partner is the same person you fell in love with before. Their sexuality does not change their personality. No matter how hard it may be at first, keep chanting the mantra in your head before you act on any impulses. And if you already did, apologize and take the following steps to be a better partner for your transgender companion.
Educate
yourself
I must mention that if this would be the first time
educating yourself on a new topic, you are failing the entire human race and
all the coming generations. Anyhow, do you know that the transgender community identifies
according to the person’s identity and gender expression? It is confusing, but Human
Rights Campaign has helped explain the difference here.
Read that and more articles to show your partner that you care. Learn about challenges faced by the community, how to be a good ally, non-binary gender, and more.
Ask what
you don’t know, don’t assume
Many reasons show that using the correct pronoun is essential for body positivity. During the process allow them to be comfortable in their skin and at their own pace. Also, ask them what their preferred pronouns are. It is rude to assume. It is hard living in a body that’s not yours, doesn’t make their names hard too.
Give yourself
space to feel it
It’s new, and you don’t know what it’s all about, nor do you
know how to react to it. That is fine, take a deep breath, we prefer honesty to
fakers. Your relationship just changed, and you are allowed to grieve and take
an adjustment period. Don’t trash your feelings to focus on your partner’s, because
you count too in this equation. openly voice your worries and concerns, it is
hard out there for the transgender community, so it’s best to be on the know-how.
Also, learn effective ways to communicate with your partner to avoid being overly critical and angry.
Listen
You might think you know everything, but you don’t. you do not know what is best for your partner, only they know that. All you have to do is ask and listen to what they say. Humans have an uncanny way of only hearing what they want. Make your relationship healthy, which means no pressure. Make your environment safe for them to communicate to you about their needs. Be their safe haven away from heaven and a beacon of positivity.
Talk sex
There are Ways
you can respectfully talk about sex with your trans lover. Many people
avoid the topic altogether for fear of saying the wrong thing and upsetting
their partner. However, that only leaves room for hurtful assumptions. The whole
experience will be a bummer rather than a fun adventure. Start the conversation
as a casual chat about likes and dislikes, then delve into needs. This way, the
spotlight isn’t on your partner alone.
In conclusion, keep in mind that your relationship is not
defined by your partner’s identity. Also, encourage your partner to reach out
to LGBTQ communities for support through their journey. A community outside
your relationship helps your partner feel accepted and secure.
